Targeted

They sat across from me at a local café — two young women chatting together as they waited for their takeout order to be ready. I was engrossed in rereading one of my favorite books and eating an early lunch. I heard one of the women say, “It’s like I have a target on my back.” I turned and told them that I wasn’t trying to listen to their conversation but that I had overheard them. I repeated it for emphasis. I told them I had had an immediate thought that I felt compelled to share with them. I asked permission. They gave it. “Here’s the thing,” I said, “the first thing to do if you have a target on your back is to turn the t-shirt around. Put the target on the front where everyone can see it.” They laughed as they said, “Oh, that’s good.” I went on to explain that a target on your back becomes about you. You start to walk around with your shoulders metaphorically slumped. You become the victim. If the target is on the front, then suddenly it is about the person who is targeting you. You’re demonstrating that you are onto their (inappropriate) behavior or goal. You’re letting everyone know that you are aware of the situation and that it is not making you smaller. I suggested she wear some sort of circle pin or necklace to remind herself that she is standing tall and facing the situation and not letting it diminish her.