What’s Expected

Cinse Bonino
May 20, 2023

I was talking to a friend today.

She’s younger than me.

We were discussing how the world expects women to be,

how women become convinced to perform,

to fill a role,

to behave in certain expected ways.

I explained how this playacting often results in our romantic partners

becoming attracted to or falling in love with someone who isn’t actually us,

how when we finally start to feel comfortable enough

to be our real selves in a relationship that the other person

feels confused or the victim of a bait and switch.

Only in her 30s, my friend has come to understand that this relationship recipe

always ultimately yields results that resemble a sunken soufflé or a burnt Bundt cake. Her awareness gives me hope for the continued evolution of humans as a species.

Cinse Bonino



Cinse Bonino

Cinse, a former professor with a background in the psychology of human learning, writes nonstop, and is addicted to capturing the human experience in words.